People seem to be in various stages of thought in this economic environment. Is it better, or are we being optimistic?
Beloved and I are not immune to the confusion. Better to be practical though, so after our romantic budget discussion I set about making changes. The one sacrifice neither Beloved nor I am ready to make, however, is letting go of Rowena. She is our babysitter, cook, and family member (at least in our eyes). Rowena is very clever and knows how valuable she is. When she first came to us, she set her price low knowing that soon we would not be able to function without her and she would be able to name her price - sort of like a heroin dealer. After a month of her meals, care for our children and quiet calming presence in our chaotic household, she sat Beloved and me down for a re-negotiation. I immediately shout out, "Yes! We agree to your terms!" and run to throw my arms about her in a teary hug. While politely disengaging her legs from the tight clasp of my arms, she reminds me she hasn't laid her terms out yet. Beloved, in a confident, smug manner said maybe it would be best if he and Rowena discuss this privately. While firmly holding my elbow and leading me out of the living room he whispers, "You are too emotionally involved in this...let me handle it. After all darling, negotiating is what I do..." He saunters back into the living room not quite rubbing his hands together, but clearly enjoying the idea of going into battle. I take one more look at the tiny Filipina lady sitting quietly, hands folded and feel horribly guilty. "Poor poor Rowena" I think. Half an hour later, I hear heavy masculine shoes stomping up the stairs. Rowena joins me in the kitchen and quietly starts making dinner. I smile nervously and bow myself out of the room. I find Beloved in his office with a stormy look on his face writing a check with hard jabbing motions. He finishes and walks out of the room with me following, asking him how the negotiating went. Without looking me in the eye he says he,"can't be bothered with all this nickel and diming," his "time is more valuable than this", he "can't be expected to negotiate if he is not aware of all the details", he "doesn't want to be bothered with all these household matters when he comes home..."
Rowena now makes a salary, with benefits, that would not be insulting to a first year Yale Law School graduate.
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